i kept mistaking one for the other

a poem about celibacy

i kept inviting strangers
to stand in the doorway
of a house
i haven’t lived in for years

they touched me
tried the handle
to see if it was unlocked

and for a split second,
i swore
someone turned on the lights,
someone came home.

desire is loud.

clunky.

it arrived out of breath,
kicked its shoes off,
put its hands everywhere.

intimacy knocks
so softly
i’ve never heard i…